कह हनुमंत बिपति प्रभु सोई। जब तव सुमिरन भजन न होई॥

Things to remember.

In the middle of it all…

Do not forget…

Push and pull continues - so that you can be stable…

Do you want to burn it all quickly? Then say it forever.. 

Make a project of sorts…people who won’t get it…

The minute you forget, this will happen - so never forget… you have been put here for a reason and that reason is not like others. 

It’s imperative for us to review this one book together. If I can teach and learn this one thing together with them, that’d be so fine! 

Young people these days are career-oriented, focused on getting settled in the world - so by the time they are in their 30s, they have dated but not married. They are successful in every way but they do not have a partner. I hear that they are extremely unhappy. Are they really unhappy or are they just experiencing FOMO? Are the truly miserable or their lack of not having a partner is causing an unseen discrimination, bias and insecurity in them? Will such people be less miserable if society does not put so much weightage on marriage? Saying that people have a lot of options today is wrong - men always had options even before - they could approach families for marriage and reject girls till they found what they wanted. 

The problem is that women have options now and the rate a which they are rejecting men was not possible before. This is resulting in them also being single for longer - which was avoided by early marriages / arranged marriages and such. They'd discover the flaws of the partner AFTER they had committed and no one was allowed to leave. Even if they wanted to leave, they had less to no choice.

So the pain associated with marriage was always there, its just that it is becoming more transparent and hence the so called "confusion" and "noise". How come a structure that was historically working is not working anymore? The hush-hush corruption in the system kept it going. You see no one was talking about it. 

The amount of pressure people put on themselves in finding a partner is insane. Having lived all these years and experienced many aspects of the same, I can vouch safely that it is just another path not just THE path as society makes it seem. The number of people who think they can never be happy because they do not have a partner is insane! And they do not consider companionship that comes from other sources to even fill that gap. And I do understand the need to have that one person that "gets" you, but it is impossible for another person to "get" you because they are not you! That leaves companionship limited to have someone around so that one is not lonely emotionally or physically. From an emotional point of view as long as someone is around to share and care (respect, love etc.) even if they are not a partner, does that not count? From a physical point of view, there are two aspects - sexual and purely having a body around so that one is not scared or lonely as one goes about one's life. Out of these two, sexual companionship is the need that can met only by a partner. 

So are we as a society, equating marriage to sex mainly and everything else mentioned above will come along with it? What if some other things mentioned above are missing? Should someone marry under pressure? When the marriage status is equated with the happiness and overall value of a person - is that not scary? Everyone starts discriminating people on the basis of marital status? 

If the pressure of marriage is removed, won't people be a lot more happier? May be then, they can peacefully focus on themselves instead of focusing on finding a suitable partner. All that extra energy will go in something more meaningful in my opinion.