Sunday, December 30, 2018

2018

Another year has come to an end. This could be one of the first times when I recall being so cold in the last few days of December.  "I want to vegetate" was my motto since 26th December and vegetate, I did. Palm Springs was tiring as such but beautiful too. I am tired of cold basically. I completed 10th episode of Memories of the Alhambra. So want to visit the Granada station now, just to see it up close. Would be a bit wary of the Alhambra Palace after todays episode.

I have never made new year resolutions. Partly because I know I won't keep them, partly because I did not have a firm resolution to pursue. And so it remains this year too. Though I wish for more adventure and exploration aimed within. 2017 was a crucial year and 2018 continued to show the path. I am a bit tired but I know that 2019 is aware of the path and next steps. I am not going to wait for it with bated breath. There is no need. There is a plan and a place for everything - it will reveal itself.

If only I can escape this cold... 

Monday, December 17, 2018

The Memories of the Alhambra

My post raving about Netflix's original The Memories of the Alhambra is required since I spent yesterday watching all 6 episodes and am sleep deprived as a result of it.

In the hindsight, was it that fun? Yes, yes and yes! I recall how I felt as I started episode 4 and could not watch it due to Anika's dance recital. :)


Found a note..

I found an old note in my email from April 2013. It was written in a flow, hastily because I must have thought of it in the middle of something. 

We do see folks go through mental upheaval at the onset of problems, the one that makes them question their purpose, spirituality and life in general. That is pretty normal and can be understood. Now imagine a life that changed its course completely at the mere thought of what his life is and could be. Never in the history, we’ve seen someone leave a perfectly happy and content life, been so shaken by the idea of what human life goes through, give up a perfectly normal, happy and prosperous lifestyle for finding the answers that could grant him peace. For once when the truth is realized, it is pretty difficult to ignore it once again. What causes such uproar in a mind, where the falsity of it all strikes so hard that it is unbearable to the point of no return. Budhha knew it. 

Having some time re-reading it and with 5 years gone by, I think I understand this better. I understand the qualities of the person that can think in this way - sensitive, aware and deeply thoughtful. The clarity comes in a moment - it is like a rude awakening from the stories we spin around us. And yes, once it is known, it cannot be ignored. Ignoring it is not one of the qualities of such a person. 

Thursday, December 13, 2018

Crazy Rich Asians

Vacations are fun and travel back is always tiring. But I happened to see Crazy Rich Asians and being the lover of Asian flicks and  dramas, obviously liked it. It was fun to watch the extent of wealth people have and can have. 

Universe..

Universe is listening to our thoughts.

That's only true because we are are the universe in motion.

We are part of that fabric,
a tug can create a wrinkle,
any wrinkle that appears on the fabric,
shows.

Tat Tvam Asi. 

Wednesday, December 5, 2018

12/5/2018

Thought 1:
The aim of life is to live and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware.
-- Henry Miller

Thought 2:
Purity of thought, intent and action
Purity of will, resilience and toil
Incantation of hope, harmony and love
To walk the path the soul seeks.

Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Ocean and Fish

Can this universe, which is but a mere reflection, 
Engender greed in wise men? 
The ocean surely does not become agitated 
By the movement of a little fish.

-- वैराग्य शतक (भर्तृहरि)

Vairagya Shatak

In enjoyment, there is the fear of disease; In social position, the fear of falling-off; In wealth, the fear of hostile kings; In honor, the fear of humiliation; In power, the fear of foemen; In beauty, the fear of old age; In scriptural erudition, the fear of opponents; In virtue, the fear of traducers; In body, the fear of death. ; All the things of this world pertaining to man Are attended with fear; Renunciation alone stands for fearlessness.

Birth is attacked by death; Brilliant youth by old age; Contentment by greed; Happiness of self-control By the wiles of gay women; Virtues by the jealousy of men; Forest tracts by beasts of prey; Kings by wicked counsel; And powers even are vitiated By their evanescence; What on earth is not seized upon By something else?

Health of men is rooted out By hundreds of varied ailments Of body and mind; Whereupon Lakshmi, The goddess of prosperity, alights: There perils find an open access; Death surely annexes to itself, Rendering impotent very soon, Whatever is born again and again. Then what is created as stable By the absolute Creator?

-- Vairagya Shatak by Bhartrihari (link)

Monday, December 3, 2018

Thou art not that..

I see you as you stand, tired yet tall
Not a sign on your face that can carry a fault
It was just hard, long trip from long back
How could you have avoided that crookedness to nowhere

It’s done, it’s gone, it’s way back in past
It has finally nothing that you may resemble at last
How can one say that the ship that sails
Is the one that was launched or systematically replaced

It was just plain tiring is all we know
It was needed just as we need the sun to grow
Yet this was not bright, this was not warm
And all it did was kept some lives afloat 

This is at last that point in life
Where what matters is just plain in sight
Who cares what happened eons ago
What matters is that I see you stand tall and glow

Saturday, December 1, 2018

The meaning of Service

I think 3.5 days in, it dawned on me the real meaning of service. To serve.

When nothing can make one happy from within, service can.

Collect those smiles and build your bank balance.

Service with right intent.

Service with no expectation.

Serve who come to you.

Serve who need you.

Silence

Silence is priceless.
Silence is pristine.
Silence has in it this wholeness that cannot be described in words.
Silence is noble
Silene is sanity

Saturday, November 3, 2018

Traveller

Use to make Anika listen to it almost every day at one time - such long time back

Anoushka & Sitar

I attended their show in 2009 - Ravi Shankar and Anoushka Shankar at Davis Hall - San Francisco (29th Oct to be Precise)

I started noticing and following her since then.

At one time I wanted to name my daughter as Anoushka



Sitar does sound fun in a dark room at night. 

Friday, November 2, 2018

retreat

I have to document this before I head out to my retreat. I hope I am not let down by the experience. I hope the 10 days are worth it. If not, it should turn out to be a good outing experience at minimum.

Each of us have our own path to walk.

Though the fun part is, I can see how it is all linked and inter related. Everything and every moment. How things happen as a flow and could have only happened since the parameters were set like that.

How energy of people shift and as they shift attraction and repulsion are caused automatically.

How everything impacts everyone.

How a small change in me causes a bigger change in my children. They, by the way, can quote Mahamrityunjaya Mantra and more. And I would get proud when they could identify a Michael Jackson song at one time - seems a long time ago.

How my intention plays out my life.

How I want to reduce my actions to increase the impact

How I can literally see this playing out in front of me in slow motion.

Life is the most beautiful thing to have ever happened to anyone. Only if they look closer to see the cosmic plan in action - its riveting.

Ahead in Time

Sometimes the calling is too clear.

And sometimes it becomes clear-er as you try to ignore it on that path.

In any case, it cannot be avoided.

Evolution in the head needs to meet the real life person.

It is all too fast.

It is all 10 years ahead of time. 

travel

I had read a long time back that one can travel the world without leaving their house. I had wondered what it meant and I had understood it as one can learn all the experiences within their home if they are observant enough. The world teaches nothing more. We learn from our experiences whether we have it in Europe or on a ship. It does not matter.

And I happened to re-read this while searching for the original quote : "You cannot travel the path until you have become the path itself". I think I know this, a little better at this time but I have generally known this in my life. I have to live a life I believe in or I have change my belief. It cannot be one belief and another life.

The ability to extrapolate has been my strength. To take a grain of experience and to extrapolate it to how it can be has helped me a lot to expand my thought horizon. 

#metoo

Oh, did I mention my stint with feminism kind of ended the way it started - abruptly. It happened sometime back and the trigger seems to be slipping from my memory. I had a conversation where male bashing happened - probably that. Or no, it was about Tavleen Singh mentioning something about #metoo in villages and how this movement is of the rich & intellectual class.

It led to how only educated can uplift and bring about a thought revolution and hence it had to start the upper strata probably. And then some how the train of thought shifted towards rise of the matriarchal society where kids were the common property of the society since women were allowed to handle multiple relationships. To me it sounded exactly like the patriarchal set up which allows men to have that right. Of course a matriarchal society would consider children a lot more. But it still does not solve the problem of people genuinely getting hurt in relationships. It is just flipped. None of these societies take true emotions into consideration.

A balanced society is a myth unless everyone is balanced enough to be with their equal match. An equal match, a true balanced relationship always takes emotions of their partner into consideration - whatever it is.

And that involves a lot of introspection and is a tall order indeed. 

Sunday, October 21, 2018

I wonder

Truth at the right time can deliver.

An alignment in thoughts, actions, words can deliver.

We think we are helping someone by not speaking out.

At least it would not make one wonder about what was really true.

What felt true was is really true? What felt false was is really false?

In the hindsight nothing matters.


Saturday, September 8, 2018

Signs

To be in "foolish" in the worldly sense is to find your way out. Universe provides enough signs to find that path. Did you ignore the signs?

Key is to mute the chatter and focus. 

Mahamrityunjaya Mantra



Features in Rig Veda 7.59.12

I call upon Tryambakam in my prayers to increase the fragrant prosperity. Just as a ripe cucumber falls from the vine, free my soul from the vine like body - make me free from death and give me immortality.

#literal #translation

Him and I

To be in love with an equal.

Monday, August 20, 2018

Short and Gray

I embraced my grays. Last week to be precise. I was pondering over it since May. And then I missed my appointment for 2 weeks in a row (it had to do with my emotional state) and then I just had to. It is so empowering to just be. It was I who colored back in 2008 and it was I who won't in 2018. I had proclaimed backed in 2012-2013 that I was to go natural in my 40s. But I had not given it a thought till this year May. Denver made me realize how good it feels to be just me. And I still have 3 years to be 40.

I decided to change my parlors and I did. I will miss Le but I will visit her more as a friend now. Every now and then with small requests, appointments and such. But we are done as client and hairdresser.

#embracewhoyouare

Love and Love

Ah to be in love and to be loved! It is intoxicating as much as it is a test. It tests the character and it brings out the worst.

In adulation lies downfall. In worship lies destruction. In belonging lies abandonment.

All at once.  

Stupor

So there are these women I see around me. Actually I can say about all of them I have ever known. I cannot truly say that they know - they've been conditioned and their state has been normalized. They all were born with that spark in their eyes, that spark that dulled as they grew old. Realization of how their aspirations to be unique were trampled, diverted, protected and killed - dimmed that spark in their eyes. You can see that in their photographs - old and new. They seem to be in stupor, hypnotized - trying to wriggle and struggle once in a while but sedated again by the comfort of the known or knowing that this is all they have.

The most vibrant of ones, the most gullible of ones, ones who thought they were rebels, even the ones who said they belong - all of them: stupefied. And the funny bit it that they know and they promote the benefits of the stupor.

They have forgotten that they are divine. They cannot imagine that they are magical. They cannot believe that they are indeed, who once they thought, they were. 

feminist

Never in my lifetime I have called myself a feminist. I did not understand the concept - truly I mean. So in order to be something, we need to experience what it takes or is. Without experiencing and knowing, how can one convincingly be anything?

Wednesday, August 15, 2018

Seek yourself

What we seek is also seeking us. That’s true.

We also soon realize that what we were seeking was also always in us. Because to look for something specific we need to know what those specifications are. Those unique specifications can be provided by only us. How do we know what to look for? But we are conditioned to look outside and tour the entire world to come to the truth as simple as this.

It is beautiful to fall in love with a person’s being. Not their phases, aspects or parts. It is beautiful to  paint this picture of love in the canvas of life - because a love so great can only be held in a canvas so great. One would need to see the entire lifetime in a snapshot to see the beautiful picture it paints.

Be that example that you want to follow. That’s the way to find that love. That’s also the way to fall in love - with yourself.

Seek yourself. In seeking that you’ll arrive at that love story. 

Sunday, August 12, 2018

Fraud

I feel like a fraud. Most of the days. I wish I could silence my mind. Yet this space makes me see who I really am. Most human and fragile and pathetic at times. We all are.

We use our big words and big intellect to make ourselves believe the most. Yet we know. We don’t acknowledge it enough. None of us do. 

Shouldn’t we be silent and just be silent. The words just don’t do justice. They are too fraudulent. 

Friday, July 13, 2018

Status Quo

Nature does not think much of status quo. It gets pleasure in changing situations just when one gets comfortable in their space. It is truly like waves of the sea - no drastic change yet nothing is ever same. 

Wednesday, July 11, 2018

Walk Out of Eden

I am impressed by Aarti Rao’s Initiative of joining Paul Salopek on his journey - Walk Out of Eden. I should do something like this some day.  

Sunday, June 24, 2018

self infliction

Every lie is against oneself, every act of deceit is towards oneself - those actions happen against us. Anyone who believes that they have managed to get away are fooling themselves. It all circles back.

So essentially we are indeed alone in this - in everything. And everything is connected.

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Ayn Rand Quotes


"Love is blind, they say; sex is impervious to reason and mocks the power of all philosophers. But, in fact, a person's sexual choice is the result and sum of their fundamental convictions. Tell me what a person finds sexually attractive and I will tell you their entire philosophy of life. Show me the person they sleep with and I will tell you their valuation of themselves. No matter what corruption they're taught about the virtue of selflessness, sex is the most profoundly selfish of all acts, an act which they cannot perform for any motive but their own enjoyment - just try to think of performing it in a spirit of selfless charity! - an act which is not possible in self-abasement, only in self-exultation, only on the confidence of being desired and being worthy of desire. It is an act that forces them to stand naked in spirit, as well as in body, and accept their real ego as their standard of value. They will always be attracted to the person who reflects their deepest vision of themselves, the person whose surrender permits them to experience - or to fake - a sense of self-esteem .. Love is our response to our highest values - and can be nothing else."
"People think that a liar gains a victory over his victim. What I’ve learned is that a lie is an act of self-abdication, because one surrenders one’s reality to the person to whom one lies, making that person one’s master, condemning oneself from then on to faking the sort of reality that person’s view requires to be faked…The man who lies to the world, is the world’s slave from then on…There are no white lies, there is only the blackest of destruction, and a white lie is the blackest of all."
"A man's sexual choice is the result and the sum of his fundamental convictions.... He will always be attracted to the woman who reflects his deepest vision of himself, the woman whose surrender permits him to experience a sense of self-esteem. The man who is proudly certain of his own value, will want the highest type of woman he can find, the woman he admires, the strongest, the hardest to conquer--because only the possession of a heroine will give him the sense of an achievement."
"I regret nothing. There have been things I missed, but I ask no questions, because I have loved it, such as it has been, even the moments of emptiness, even the unanswered-and that I loved it, that is the unanswered in my life."
"In all proper relationships there is no sacrifice of anyone to anyone... Men exchange their work by free, mutual consent to mutual advantage when their personal interests agree and they both desire the exchange. If they do not desire it, they are not forced to deal with each other. They seek further. This is the only possible form of relationship between equals. Anything else is a relation of slave to master, or victim to executioner."
"Man—every man—is an end in himself, not a means to the ends of others; he must live for his own sake, neither sacrificing himself to others nor sacrificing others to himself; he must work for his rational self-interest, with the achievement of his own happiness as the highest moral purpose of his life."
"This miracle of me is mine to own and keep, and mine to guard, and mine to use, and mine to kneel before...The fortune of my spirit is not to be blown into coins of brass and flung to the winds as alms for the poor of spirit."
"I shall choose friends among men, but neither slaves nor masters. And I shall choose only such as please me, and them I shall love and respect, but neither command nor obey. And we shall join our hands when we wish, or walk alone when we so desire."

x

Stay

We attract people we need in our lives and only they come to us and absolutely required ones, stay :)
So enjoy the crazy ride called life and be thankful for everyone in your life.

Be Fine..

It took me more than a year to clear my head enough to think through and some more to stabilize. I came to the following conclusion:

1. I was responsible for what I did - others were responsible for what they did. So I can only talk about myself. Even though I can see their side as a 3rd person - I am NOT the 3rd person. So I need to stick to my own actions.

2. My intention was clear at every point to me - if others had issues with that it is not my problem. I am sure they had their intention clear as well. At every point I knew what I was doing. I am responsible and I have to sit through what happened.

3. It took 2 people to make things happen, it took 2 people to make things go wrong (again, not my fault alone and not my problem)

4. Could have I avoided things that happened? No. I could not have avoided any of it - I was acting from everything I knew at that point of time - even if skewed in the hindsight. I did not have the hindsight then - so I cannot blame anyone - not even myself.

5. Do I have any regrets? NO. I don't regret anything I did - good or bad. It was a part of me and my actions and it was very relevant at that point. How can I regret anything - at every point I knew I was doing (with all my knowledge at that time).

6. Some of what happened could not have been avoided - due to my nature - my lack of communication, my tendency to be a stupid person, my skewed vision of the world etc. I CANNOT do anything about because that is how I was/am.

7. I learnt to accept a lot of flaws in me and I am fine with them - thats what I am, big deal! I don't hold my self in any kind of regard. I am trying to get to know me better now.

8. For everything I have realized that my own nature has saved me at number of times. My intuition was better than a lot of things people told me.

9. Things may have not been handled correctly - but things that happened - needed to happen for the growth of my soul. I had to learn some lessons and I have learnt them for my own good. It was also a good thing to happen for everyone else around me - in the long run. I learnt from them - they learnt from me.

10. It does not help to look back and say I could have done this or that - because, if I could - I would not be here! I mean, I would not be me :)

11. People around us deserve our best side - none of our past were their fault. We are in present and we are looking at future. We should forget our past and move on. I have selective memory so that helps. I have my own therapy method for me that works wonders - absolute NO revision of past - no contact with folks who can for any reason bring back a bad taste in my mouth. Staying away from anything that will make my soul unhappy. Destroying anything that can remind me of past - bringing new things and most important - making absolutely new and happy memories with people in my present.

12. I cannot stress enough but please fake happiness by doing everything that really makes you happy - your soul happy. Don't hurt your soul. Don't interact with people who can hurt your soul. Surround yourself with people who lift your soul higher, who add to you and who at no time subtract from you. You will eventually become happy for real :)

I really hope these things can help. The place where you are, you need to be convinced and be happy. You need to make an effort and think of it as a weight losing program - just go through it and think later ;)

#note2afriend

Summary

Often we make the mistake of thinking that we were creators of our lives but we are not. We are animals and are governed by chance. Each of us imagine that we are doing things, but far from it - we are just reacting to things most of the times. You have reacted to most of it. You may think you were in charge, you were never in charge - just pompously thinking that you were. We are a sum total of everything that has happened before us. Even our house of birth was not our choice, our parents were not our choice, our environment was not our choice - but it made us what we are today. One thing leads to another - we could not have done anything differently. That is the biggest truth of life. At every point, we can only make the most educated choice. And hopefully the one that does not hurt people and promotes our peace of mind. 

Monday, June 11, 2018

Sense of belonging that comes from within cannot be over ridden by transient actions of this realm. It is as interesting as it always was. It cares not of space, time and distance. It never did before and it will not do now. That is how it will be. 

clueless

Knowing it begets the pain
To pretend to not know will hurt much more...
Sometimes being clueless is a blessing. 
It is not easy to love. 

Wednesday, June 6, 2018

Love

Unconditional love
  • has acceptance, understanding, friendship, guidance, forgiveness, laughter, respect, admiration  
  • is present in the moment, it saves as much as it celebrates, it encourages to be authentic, it serves and trusts
  • does not judge, mock, compare or neglect
Unconditional love is the highest form of love. But each and every format of love has the capacity to provide brief glimpse of relief that our soul craves for. That is one reason, all life form respond and react to love automatically.

Hence no form of love can be looked down upon.

Godhead

So the Hindu thought is to find god head within and become whole. What if we seek that god head in another human being? What if we seek enlightenment through love of another?

It is through love of each other that we will find salvation. or enlightenment. Love is like the support we need to grow to the next level of our authentic self. If we extrapolate this to the highest level of existence, this is when we truly experience the godhead within. 

Love and Growth

When we fall in love with anyone, with whatever reason it is - we give them space to be themselves. We give that space to be vulnerable. We let them breath in that space. And when we do that truly, they have that window of opportunity to grow. Like parent's love lets a child grow. But parent's love is unconditional for a child. Our love for our partners is not - it has conditions. Till the conditions are met - we let them have that space to grow. The problem with conditions is that they have shelf lives. Conditions change as we change. In case of unconditional love, someone can find courage to explore and understand themselves better. They are allowed to be themselves.Unconditional love is the highest kind of love and that is why it is said that parents are the only people who truly love us. Finding that in a partner is unheard of and hence a blessing. 

Sublime

Love in our world is a matter of dependency. Materialistic, physical or intellectual. At this least these are the parameters people know of and follow in some combination of sorts. A smaller subset of people may even consider spiritual as a parameter apart from the 3 mentioned. If we get the 3 parameters in a partner, we are super lucky but if we get all 4 parameters in a partner - that is being blessed. Love generated in such a combination is sublime. What is the next step for such a story?

Relate to Love

When there is no materialistic, physical or intellectual dependency in a partner - it essentially means that these people can stay apart happily. In this case, the only pull that brings them together is spiritual. Can we be with someone who we do not need in real life at all? We can only be with such a person when we are fulfilled ourselves - there would be this confidence of handling any situation single handedly - hence no ego dictating fear or need or requirement to show someone down because they seem to be better. Then the partners command equal respect. And we know that we end up loving what we respect. It is like the pull of the equals. It is like relating with someone who has had the same experience and can completely understand what is means or takes to go through some situation single handedly. We fall in love with what we can relate to.

Tuesday, April 24, 2018

I have to find out me. 

Right Vs. Right

I had not thought about it till now but a random read on the internet brought this lesson back to me. Every time I have been faced with a conflict, I have not hesitated to take the steps that aligned with my internal integrity. It broke social norms, moral codes and ethics in eyes of many but it always held my internal integrity high. I was proud of it and I was at peace all throughout because of that. It brought that confidence back to me.

Another conflict appeared before me but this time, it has slowed down time and it is showing me the various aspects of a situation. My initial reaction to align with my internal integrity was held back by another code of ethics that I follow. So it is simply my integrity vs. my gratitude. The situation has completely made me stop in my tracks and think. This is no right vs. wrong situation. This is right vs. right situation. And this requires time to show natural progression of things to me. At every step all I need to do is to not deviate from what is right - what feels right - what internally I know is right.

This may hurt a lot. But this has to be done. At every step. 

Sunday, April 15, 2018

tao te ching

The pursuit of learning results in daily increase,
Hearing the Way leads to daily decrease.
Decrease and again decrease,
     until you reach non-action,
Through non-action,
     no action is left undone.

Should one desire to gain all under heaven,
One should remain ever free of involvements.
For,
Just as surely as one becomes involved,
One is unfit for gaining all under heaven. 

Friday, April 13, 2018

apertura

After a long time I am listening to The Motorcycle Diaries.this album and this movie had captured my imagination. I had bought the DVD back then and had a major crush on Gael Garcia Bernal. The beats and drums in Apertura is something. Every track in the album has this primal feel to it as if it knows the origin of music. It’s so simple and yet so profound. Only Chipi Chipi seems of this world. Every other track introduces me to South America first hand.

And it has brought me to a space which I can recognize as my space.

Thursday, March 8, 2018

Temple Bells

The whole point is to be one with that vibration. And if we have to do that we need tuning fork. If one is silent enough once can feel the body/heart vibrate with the sound of temple bells. They are required to make the folks remember that sound, that sound of creation. We are all vibrating but we need to tune to that one sound. Om. 

Tuesday, March 6, 2018

easy

Who said it would be easy. But I am blessed. 

Lesson

I am reminded of a post/note that I may have made earlier. I have observed this in life that a certain lesson until resolved always comes back as situations to give us another chance at learning.

It repeats until it is learnt and assimilated in life. 

Saturday, February 24, 2018

23rd Feb

The journey inside is like hurtling in space. Feeling the body dissolve and get to the core of the being. It is all light within. Light and space. And the vastness of universe. Till the body is tuned to the frequency of the oldest sound known - Om. Body resonates at that frequency - everything we know does. Hence the need to listen to the vibrations.

The dimensions are many - it is a multi universe. We are different in different dimensions. Like a 2D brush stroke in this life - the movie plays almost like the clay animation. Our life is a clay animation. The beings know it but they play it out. At lower frequencies matter is dense and can be visualized. At high frequencies it is all energy,  everything we know seems to be made up of threads that go vertical/horizontal mesh close to the image below:


And that is why information can be detected from anywhere in the universe. Information travels fast. It is like awareness. That fast. Everything we know is connected to each other in so many dimensions. But I did see us travelers experiencing this dimension on purpose. And could only see the 3 of us connected through light rope. We are traveling together for a purpose and know no other traveler so far. Have to confirm if they feel the same.

The senses are of no consequence. They distract us. They purposely pull us into this dimension.

And all of us are light / energy. It is easy to see the entire universe in a moment. It is possible. It is the realization of its vastness that fills us with awe. Everything we know is suspended in the frequencies / waves / energy. These words can be used interchangeably because they are one and the same. There is no need to distinguish anything - it is all the same. It is unified, connected and the most simple expression. It is just that it cannot be explained / defined to someone who has never experienced it. The vastness outside of us and the vastness inside of us are one and the same. We can visualize it.

The "sookshm" (subtle) and the "sthool" (apparent) bodies : I understood that since I saw it dissolve. I saw the apparent body dissolve till it was tuned to the frequency of creation. It was a point and a source once. That is when a curtain dropped from the stage. And I realized how easily it was experienced what we have heard. All of it fits and makes sense.